Tuesday 1 April 2014

Toby Mac - Get Back Up (Lyrics)

When you face disappointment how you react matters?

  For the record, I wrote this months ago, but courage failed me, and airing this grand disappointment was too much to share.  

  I received a piece of disappointing new yesterday.  I'd been waiting to hear from a publisher for a year and a half and the news finally came via email late afternoon.  I had already had a bit of a bummer of a day and I was feeling emotionally raw and a little bit wrung out. 
  I wasn't expecting it, that's for sure, and to be honest, most days I didn't even think about my work and its success or failure being held in the palm of another's hands.  Yesterday for certain it was the furthest thing from my mind.  But the ax fell nonetheless.
  I will easily admit that it wasn't my best work, it was only my second attempt at telling a story after all, but there was something in this one that made it extra special, magical if you will, that had me believing in it.  I guess it would be best put that this story holds my heart, or a huge piece of it anyway.
  Here you go guys, the moment you've all been waiting for....I am going to spill my guts!
  I wanted this, probably more than I have ever wanted anything in my life, and it's sort of bizarre because I could do absolutely nothing to help my cause; I could only wait.  I couldn't perform at peak levels at a second tryout, shake hands or meet the decision makers face to face.  I couldn't hand over a plan to sell the crap out of this book, I couldn't convince them of the validity and saleability of my imagination's story.  I could only wait, and so that's what I did.  I waited.
  I saw the email and I somehow knew.  You couldn't receive such wonderful news with no bells and whistles or fanfare to accompany it.  It's funny, I was prepared for the rejection, it would be foolish not to be, but even so, I didn't see it coming, and certainly not on this day.
  So YES!  I am incredibly disappointed.  I am feeling a bit wounded, raw and scraped up.  I am wondering where to look, where to turn and ultimately what my next step will be.

Here's What I Know

  Yes, disappointment sucks.  
  I will not let it define me.
  Rejection does not mean failure.
  There is no shame in disappointment on this occasion.
  I wrote a book!  I wrote a book that the publishers were interested in and held on to for a long time, but ultimately couldn't choose for whatever reason.
  I wrote a book!  That's what matters.  I did one of those things I'd always wanted to do, something I LOVE, and that is a grand success in itself, (even if only those of you who ask are the lucky ones to hold it in your hands).  
  I also know I won't quit; this is just one obstacle on the journey.
  I will keep writing because it is something I love, something that is inside of me and needs to be let out. I write for me and any other affirmation I receive would simply be icing on the cake!
  I will not give up.

  My princes love this song, they love all that Toby Mac does actually.  My giant child put this song on first thing this morning; he's our morning DJ.  He knew nothing about my rejection, I didn't have a chance yesterday to talk with them about it, and I honestly needed to steep myself in my feelings before I did, to understand what I felt, why and what it all means to me.  But they have been on this journey with me so I will speak to them about it soon; there is a lesson in everything.
  Anyway, have a listen and whether you like the song or not, you tell me if there is a lesson to be learned in the lyrics.  I would go so far as to say that, for me, this morning anyway, these words are Heaven sent.

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